After having the feeding tube for a few days, Titus ended up losing weight. After a bad little episode, our pediatricians sent us back home to pack for Arkansas Children’s Hospital. Our friends descended on us. It’ll take an entire post or two to explain how they served and what it did to my heart. I don’t know how we would have made it into the van with 4 boys all packed up without our community. I’ve done the ugly cry over and over since then, what it’s like to be on the other side of servitude.
Rich Mullins and King David sang us to Little Rock. All the black hills rolled, like following whole, slow notes on a full scale. I wondered about whether or not I hunger and thirst for righteousness. My sister-in-law met us at the ER and loaded up the big boys, one crying and buckling himself back into our van not wanting us to leave him. Another one has a birthday tomorrow, and my sister-in-law is taking so much of our burden.
The ER was truly entertaining, but I walked like a zombie. They took Titus’ blood and asked a bazillion questions and helped us articulate some of what’s been happening with Titus’ failure to thrive. We finally got a room at 3:30 AM. I slept 2 hours.
We met the doctor and fell in love. He’s a GI specialist and has a whole team. He and his partner are the doctors I was praying to somehow get in to see. Titus has thrown up several times over the past week, including tonight. We’re discouraged to watch him continue to lose weight in tiny increments, but his IV is giving him what he needs for now. The feeding tube is hit and miss.
Today (Tuesday) they seemed to wrap their heads around his mystery, and tomorrow they’ll run a number of tests. After midnight tonight he’s not allowed to eat. He’ll have a procedure at some point tomorrow (hopefully in the morning) to scope and biopsy his intestines and all that good stuff, and then he gets to have his very first colonoscopy. Poor buddy T.
I suspect that tomorrow will be a rough spot. After the procedure, he’ll be placed on the WHO Protocol for malnutrition.
Just now, we turned off the feed in the tube, because his body is saying No. I don’t know how to pray, but I see God. I am smiling. We have joy. I’ve hardly responded to a single message or comment, but so many have brought me to tears and shown us God’s love. I can’t tell if I’m being dramatic or if I’m not reacting strongly enough. Thank you for praying.
I know I was made for the night watch.
“Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied.”